discovery

I just found a recording that I recorded last year.

It is rough and boring, but really shook me to the core because I had completely forgotten I had ever recorded it. I'm going to try to upload it in its original recording, but I'll use the phone if I got to in order to get it here. This one recording is the one reason why I started blogging in the first place.

I wanted to track our course through this really weird time of trust and growth in our relationship with God. So consider this the first entry in Love Wisdom Power. The recording is about 11 min so I had to break it into 3 recordigns due to time limits per phone recording.
1st of 3
2nd of 3
3rd of 3

I'm sorry for the bad recording and lack of direction, but its Raw; so that is what you get.

from the musings of christine

well - i am sitting here watching my students take my final exam. it is an exciting feeling knowing that this year is almost over. i can taste it. and then, when i look back to the shaky beginnings, it makes me realize how much i have learned. a friend told me just yesterday that we should always try things that make us uncomfortable every once in a while. at first i cringed when she said that, thinking about all the fitful nights of sleep, the horrible rides home, the voices of whiny students, crazy parents, etc...and then i thought about how i have become a lot more creative at "going with the flow". engineers do not do this. period. and about how i have learned to laugh when i say the wrong things in class, and have realized how impacting my words may be - even when i thought them somewhat meaningless at the time. and patience. i pray for patience. i can see how my "inner peace" affects those around me in a greater way than ever before. i have learned that i cannot be everything to everyone. i am loosening up when it comes to life in general. it will be ok if my pants aren't always ironed or my hair fixed or my bathrooms clean. and i am tightening up when it comes to spiritual discipline. or at least i am praying for more discipline and i see the need for it more clearly. my point is, when life puts the squeeze on you, you realize what is important. and that has been very strengthening and liberating for me, and i am still learning.

so - in the midst of paper airplanes, ipods, gossip, fights, drama, and other such life-sucking activities, i have been learning how to dwell in chaos, to remain calm and patient when all i hear is complaints, and to remember that i am to be a rock in this ocean of high school life. and that means getting tough - no means no. my rules are not merely talking points for a discussion. i try to float above and not be sucked into the undertow of it all. and if nothing seems to go right, there is always tomorrow.

so - i am expecting a stronger, more confident teacher to show up in August. for now, i think i am very ready to toss aside the lesson plans and textbooks for a couple months. rest, rejuvenation, and reflection are what i am looking forward to. With that, i bid the 2005/06 school year a hearty "adieu", and for the students i will use the words of my mother, "y'all skedaddle so i can get somethin' done, you hear?" :)

R&R Racing

R&R Racing history
R&R Racing has been my company for a long time now. It was created during a period where my records and thoughts were recorded on paper. Those original papers did not survive the nomadic life style I had during my 20's. Also the years of converting from paper to digital has resulted in the loss of precious records that held the secrets to the development of my way of thinking, which was encompassed in "R&R Racing". I regret the loss of those records for my wife, because it could have helped her try to make sense out of my strange life style. Then again I'm relieved those records are lost, because they may very well pin point the degree of insanity I try to hide daily.

Original purpose
R&R Racing original stood for "Rock & Roll Racing". 'Rock' stood for it's tough, simple, and solid mission in life. 'Roll' stood for the constant movement forward towards the goal of the mission. Continue to move foraward no matter what the terrain or route. 'Racing' stood for the awareness of winners and losers. A sense of purpose to win at everything, no points for second place, always striving to get what you want, always. (corny, simple, to the point, but true)

The purpose of the company was to gain the skills and experience to provide consulting work for those who wanted to win at whatever they were doing. The slogan was:

"For those who thirst for first"

The consultants would simply apply the lessons they have learned, while racing through life, to the client's situation. Hopefully the end result would increase the client’s chances of winning "the next race", whatever that might be.

I know all this sounds either cliché, extreme, or even stupid, but that was the way I thought about things. Believe it or not, I hate talking about myself. So I developed a company to work for that had a purpose, which described how I felt about life.

The new and improved R&R Racing.
The name now stands for Ray & Ray Racing. My wife and I are in a race, like Paul describes in 1 Cor. 9:24. We use to run the race individually, but now it's more like a 3 legged race. We will finish the race together.

Our thirst for the truth about God and His relationship with us, is the purpose of the new and improved R&R Racing. The company still holds onto the original characteristics. But they are now complimented by love, faith, hope, compassion, grace, concern, humility, trust, and all the great qualities that woman have in abundance over men, generally speaking.

So from now on the authorship of this Blog belongs to the R&R Racing Company.

If it's ok with the other half of the company.

LAST DAY and FIRST DAY

This is the last day for the seniors, which makes up 4 out of 5 of my classes.

In reflection, the year has been a draw. I feel like I lost the classroom control battle, but I have gained the experience to put next year's battle in my favor to win!

NOW for the AWESOME news of the FIRST DAY.

We are the proud owners of an 18' sail boat! The mast is taller than our house! It's built for speed and comfort.

It's a 1977 Chrysler buccaneer. It's a very popular racing boat, that is also a casual day boat for the family. It can hold 6 people. It came with a trailer and is only 500 lbs, so it's very easy to move around.

I traded our 2 kayaks for the boat, trailer, 1.2 HP motor and some new rigging that came in a dry box. It's a little dirty, because it's not been used in a year, but it's in good shape.

I'll show 'before and after' clean up pictures when I get the after ones. I'm so excited I can barely think about it. I just hope Christine falls in love with sailing now. Below is a page I downloaded from the internet. They still make this boat and it goes for about $12,000 bucks new.

Timing is everything.

I was thinking the other day about our situation down here and it turned comical. So I’ll share.

1 The year we move to the keys just so happens to be the worst year in history for hurricanes in the keys.

2 When we need to drive 30 miles to work everyday the gas prices are at an all tine high and it is the first time we have ever lived in a place where the gas is WAY above the National Average.

3 Our first house was purchased at the all time high for property and homes in the keys. It’s still going down.

4 The first time in my life I have ever wanted to plant anything and now that I’m trying to grow 9 palm trees and 5 Hawaiian vines, the keys are experiencing the worst drought in history. Normal is 10.35” we are at 0.72”. I used to have 6 Hawaiian vines.

5 I always thought it would be cool to work at a place that really understands the benefits of technology. My job just gave me a really NICE Tablet PC, which is great! But I really don’t like my job.

6 It’s the first year for house insurance for us and the insurance company is talking about raising the rates from $2,000 to $8,000 in some cases.

7 Last but not least. I finally invest in the future with nanotechnology and I lose 20% of the investment in 2 months. I literally bought at the peak of a 5 year history. I knew it would be a rough ride at first, but that’s a 10ft. cliff before you even crank up the motor.

That’s all I can remember this morning. I’m sure everybody has similar situations in their life and as soon as you learn how to laugh at them, the better off you’ll be.

We did protest the gas prices yesterday!

I vaguely remember an email that suggested if everybody just runs out of gas on May 12th and sits on the side of the road in protest, it would get everybody’s attention. If half the people in the U.S. did it, all commerce would stop and gas companies would get hit HARD.

I think I’m the only one who didn’t chicken out.

All well, I tried. Until people get serious about it nothing is going to change.

That is about it. School is about over and hurricane season is about here. Please pray that both of us can draw closer to God in a peaceful time of no stress or conflict with insane teenagers.

slip 'n slide

this is christine. most likely a distant remembrance of postings past will be recalled at my name...i haven't written much.

i have been trudging through this school year, feeling much like a failure and very much broken and bruised from all my attempts at relinquishing comfort during a time filled with nothing of the like. and from having to fight lies in my head over and over again. and from learning (over and over and over...) the disciplines i need in order to survive down here. i am very aware of the fact that Satan is confident in all he has accomplished down here, and we are in a foreign territory that requires all the armor we have, every day.

so i come to this post today weary, tired, longing for a time of peace and comfort, rest and ease. and i also hate the fact that comfort is what i long for. not to bring Christ to all these people, not to be a great teacher, not to love, give, and share...i long for rest. i want familiarity. i want to let my guard down for just a few days without being almost swallowed whole with lies and deception.

so - at the moment, my life is like a slip 'n slide...i am always falling, slipping, and banging myself up...my journey not as firm as i would like it. i have seen my weakness and selfishness so often and in such ugly measures that i can just about lose it if i were to dwell on it. (and now i will actually have written proof of a bit of it)

so - no positive post today. just a few rantings of someone walking a lonely and hard road, knowing -yet at times forgetting -just how absolutely worth it this road will be, and how much deeper I will know my wonderful Father because of it.

i think when i get to heaven i will roll around in the lush grass and belt out "at last" by etta james at the top of my lungs...i am sure i will not be alone on that one :)